‘3 Years Ago I Was Broke, Depressed And Wanted To Die’- Female Rapper, Eva Alordiah Reveals

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Nigerian rapper, Eva Alordiah has stated in a new tweet about how her very existence was severely compromised by series of emotions she was going through. 

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Eva said she was broke, depressed and at a point in time she wasn’t happy she was still alive. Fortunately, after trying new ways to make money online other than solely relying on her nonexisting career, she was able to find her feet.

Her full post reads;

“3 years ago I was broke, depressed and pissed off with my existence. I stood in front of my mirror one day and broke down crying.

I felt like I was living a lie —I no longer knew who I was & I was going through one of the most painful Ego deaths I had ever experienced..

”I remember yelling at God saying —“What the fuck! What the fuck do you want me to do. Show yourself dammeeet!” —-

I think about it now..

Stupid.

”Talented, Broke, Depressed and tired of Life. Not a good combination to have.

Through many days of journaling & communing with myself, I began to learn about IDENTITY and the Ego. And how I had become Identified with what I did (Rapper).

”It was tough for me to be anything else but that, and that pissed me off even more. I wanted to be done with it.

So I said “Fck it! Whatever happens will happen, I just want to be a human being..”

”I needed to prove to myself that I good earn a living without fame, music or whatever else I was identified by.

And that was how my Journey began.

”In 2020 I focused on Learning How to earn money online— I became an active content creator, started a new IG page & shared my knowledge freely.

Then I created Courses & monetized the shit out of my Knowledge. And in the middle of the Pandemic I built http://kobocourse.com Left pointing backhand index.

You’ll never understand what it feels like for me to be able to say —“I know how to earn money without needing to be a music artiste”

To have a business that pays me without stress, to know that I can always get paid— to feel valuable and worthy..

”You’ll never understand

Within 9 months I had earned almost N17,000,000 on IG without stress — in the middle of that win, one mosquito asked me to come to perform at a show for N100,000

”You’ll never know the Joy I felt when I said, “No thank you,” and hung up the phone without remorse.

It’s freedom!!

”It’s nice to know that I can still record music when I want, how I want, ‘If’ I want. To have been dependent on my music for survival was also to throw away my Love for the Art.

Today I’m learning how to Rap again, how to listen to music, how to enjoy it without pressure

”I don’t care about Fame or having all the money in the world— all I know is, being able to tell your parents, “Don’t worry, I’ll pay for it” — is a different kind of Level up!…”

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